Shame
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One of the most damaging spells we fall under is that of shame. We believe some vicious, loveless lie our mind tells us about ourselves. We most likely pick it up in our early years, so it is ingrained, it feels true - we are bad, there is something wrong with us (even if we can’t put words to it, we just know we are wrong and bad), people would make fun of me if they only knew this or that about me, etc…
It is good to see how hateful this action in the mind is, notice the cruelty. It can be helpful to ask yourself, would I let someone talk to me like this? Would I allow a stranger or even a friend to talk to me the way my mind does when it makes me feel ashamed, bad, wrong, like a loser, a failure, not good enough? Probably not, what would you say to this stranger or friend? Most likely you would feel anger, you would defend yourself. Do you defend yourself from your own mind? Do you get angry at its tyranny? If not, maybe you should…
There is something actually quite useful in anger. The problem with anger is that most people don’t know how to use it, they are used BY it. They lose control and lash out violently, they want to hurt someone or something. This is Anger using You. But, You can use Anger. Anger is like a knife, it can hurt someone if used improperly. But it can also be used to separate things. We use knives all the time to cut things, in the same way you can use your anger to separate yourself from the destructive part of the mind, especially that part of the mind that is cruel to you or others. It can be useful to have an ally in doing inner work like this.
Next time your mind is shaming you, making you feel bad about yourself try to see that you are believing a lie. It is not true. How can I know this? Because your true nature is pure goodness, who you truly are is completely good, better than good. Perhaps your actions sometimes aren’t so great, but you are NOT your actions, nor are you your thoughts. So, if you are being made to feel bad about yourself in some way by your mind IT IS LYING TO YOU.
Get angry, as you would to a stranger who was saying the same thing to you. Go ahead, tell it to FUCK OFF and leave you alone. This is a process but over time you will notice these shame attacks don’t last as long, happen less often, and you’re just not buying into it anymore. You can use the knife or sword of divine anger to separate yourself from this toxic part of your mind.
The inner journey is not for wimps, it will test our courage and strength at times. We need to rise up and meet our demons head on, look them in the eye and not back off. You must become the master of your mind, not the other way around.
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